As my time in Barcelona comes to an end, I’ve been reflecting a lot on what I’ve learned throughout my time there, and what I’ll miss about being abroad. I’m sad to leave the excellent public transit and amazing food, as well as the slow-paced nature of life in this city. On the other hand, I’m grateful for everything I’m bringing back— new friends, many souvenirs, and a few valuable life lessons.

1. Embracing my native language 

Having been immersed in a Spanish-speaking country for two months, I’ve greatly improved my confidence in speaking Spanish as well as my ability to read, write, and comprehend the language. Speaking Spanish used to be something that made me insecure and I would either avoid it or try not to speak it very much, even with my family. I’ve grown a lot more comfortable speaking it, and I hope that this is something that stays with me when I am back in the US. 

2. Visibility of being Latina

Something I was never super conscious of is how my appearance is perceived by others. I grew up in a relatively diverse suburb in Florida with many Hispanic & Latinx friends, so I was lucky in the sense that I never felt too othered with how I look. (Not to say that I NEVER was … it just wasn’t something I really thought about.)

I do remember the feeling of staring at the “race” question on any standardized test or survey that asked for information on demographics. The US Census lists the five major categories as: White, Black or African American, American Indian or Alaska Native, Asian, and Native Hawaiian or Other Pacific Islander. I knew I didn’t look like my white friends, but I also knew I didn’t fit into any of the other categories. (Now that I am older, it makes sense as to why Hispanic/LatinX isn’t its own category, due to the variation in race across communities. It also makes sense when considering the history of Latin Americans aligning themselves with whiteness in order to avoid being racially discriminated against.) When I was a kid, my mom said I should just select the “white” category. So that’s what I did, which was honestly a bit confusing for me growing up. 

Being in Spain gave me more opportunity to reflect on my visibility as a Latina. Due to how I looked, it was very common for locals to assume I spoke Spanish, whether they thought I was also a local or a tourist from a Latin American country. In a way, it helped me realize and become more aware of how I am perceived by others, especially when it comes to my background. 

3. Being proud 

The LBGTQ+ acceptance is something that caught me off guard in Barcelona. Before participating in the MISTI program, I researched the level of LBGTQ+ acceptance to prepare myself, as I do before traveling to any new place. It’s one thing to read about the history and current state of LBGTQ+ acceptance, but another to actually see it and feel it. Being from Florida, I was not used to people being so outwardly accepting. I didn’t even realize I was queer until the end of high school due to how taboo it was to talk about it where I grew up. 

 I am in a visibly queer relationship and have been for a year and a half now, so I have gotten used to being extremely vigilant about my surroundings when out in public. I’m not a person who is super comfortable with PDA, but even if I was, choosing to do so would put my safety into question if I’m not careful. 

Seeing other people in Barcelona walking around and showing PDA without being scared was very validating and freeing, and that made me feel a lot more comfortable in the city. I even went to Barcelona Pride, which was a huge display of color and joy, and it was so much fun! It felt great to see such a large community come together.

One interaction I had with a local really stuck out to me, and I will likely remember it for years to come. I walked into a small business in the Gothic Quarter, where the owner sold prints, magnets, canvases, and more of all of her original photography from around the area. From the entire wall filled with small magnets, my eye was instantly drawn to one specific magnet: a window in Barcelona with a pride flag hanging out of it. When I brought it up to the counter to purchase it, the owner started telling me about her shop and this is when I learned that everything in the shop comes from her own original photographs. She told me the story of this particular photo, which she took about 20 years ago in the early 2000s. She went on to say that Spain and Barcelona specifically has always been one of the more accepting countries towards the LBGTQ+ community, but it wasn’t publicly shown back then. For this reason she felt that she had to take a picture of this pride flag hanging out the window. I thought it was very wholesome and added an entire new meaning to it, showing how far the community has come.

4. Solo adventures

During my free weekends in Barcelona, I took a few solo trips, something I would probably not have dreamed of doing due to fear of being alone in a new country. It was really empowering to know how to navigate and orient myself in these new places, and I am glad I got over the fear and got to experience many new sights, tastes, and more! I will really miss how easy it is to travel within Europe. I was able to find cheap flights and trains to new cities and countries, and I’m excited for the next opportunity to return. 

While solo traveling could be exciting, every now and then, something would happen that would snap me out of my bubble of bliss and remind me what it is like to be a woman traveling alone. I’ve always been cautious of my surroundings when out alone, but when in a new country, I felt like I was always on high alert. It’s sad that I’ve grown accustomed to being honked at, catcalled, and stared at, even in a new country. 

There were two times where I was walking back from work, and I was honked at. Although the weather was extremely hot, I still wore clothes appropriate to wear in a work setting, and even still, two men felt it was necessary to honk at me while driving by. On another occasion, I was walking home, and a group of men yelled something out of the car window that I didn’t quite catch. I’ve always wondered what the goal of something like that is. That I’ll be flattered and run after the car begging for their phone number? More likely, it’s definitely a feeling of having power over women, something which seemingly crosses borders and exists everywhere throughout the world. 

I took several steps to ensure my own safety while abroad. I sent my live location to my friends and family, as well as my roommate who I lived with in Spain. On my way home from work, I’d make sure to have my keys in my hand before approaching my apartment, not only as a form of self defense, but in order to minimize the amount of time I am standing on the street distracted. When traveling and staying in hostels, I would try to look for all female rooms, and lock up important items. I tried my best not to take public transit at night alone, and after hanging out with friends, we’d always text each other when we got home to ensure everyone was safe. Doing these and more, not only kept me safe but gave me peace of mind, and I feel more confident taking care of myself in these types of situations. 

5. Where I go from here 

As my final year at MIT approaches, I am grateful for my time in Barcelona, since it has helped me reflect on what my priorities are as I finish up this chapter of my life. I really admired the more relaxed outlook on careers in Spain, and I hope that is something that I can take with me into the future. 

Before leaving for Spain, I stressed over not knowing where I will be after I graduate next spring. Now, I have a bit more relaxed attitude about it all, and I’ve been reminded to stop and enjoy the journey. I was worried about my future, and felt like I needed a plan of exactly what I will do and where I will be for the next five or so years of my life. However, I definitely feel more at ease with my options now. I feel much more confident that things will work out, and I will end up where I need to be.

I feel like I now place much more of an emphasis on happiness when thinking about my future, and hopefully this is something that will help guide my decision when it comes to figuring out my life post-grad. I’m entering the season of grad school and job applications, and I am very grateful for my time in Spain that helped me go into it with this new attitude.