MISTI Blogs

Let’s talk about community 🙂

One of my greatest fears is that I will wake up one day and find myself separated from any community. I will be far from all my family (which extends across many continents by now), my friends will have settled down across all corners of the world…and I will be in my own world. I will not realize that my community is gone until I wake up and find myself perfectly quietly alone.

I know that nothing in my future is guaranteed, and anything can always happen (good or bad!). But my experiences this summer in Amman, Jordan, left me with valuable lessons about forming a community from scratch. 

A group of 6 MIT students who barely knew each other (if at all) traveled together to a new country and became an immediate support network. We gathered around the TV at the girls’ place in Apartment 4 every night to watch Love Island USA (shout out Nicolandria of course), and proceeded to comfort each other about our families, relationships, troubles, successes, etc. 

“I can’t believe Ace has such an audacity.”
“…I wish I had a better relationship with my mom.”
“Nick and Olandria are meant to be, do you see how they look at each other?!”
“…Do you want to have kids?”
“Amaya Papaya is my favorite.”
“…We might all be married in the next 10 years, isn’t that weird?”

And just like that, in a few weeks we became our own little community. A little slice of each person’s idea of a home. We shared stories and inside jokes, 3 am coffees and teas, nights on the rooftop, horror escape rooms, comedy shows and concerts…and so much more.

After long nights spent hanging out with this new group, I often woke up a little too late and way too groggy. What followed was 15 minutes of the fastest getting-ready-for-work routine you can imagine. I call a Careem¹ ride to my job as I shoved my right leg in my pants. I had maybe 3 minutes left to grab a fruit from the fridge, put on my shoes, and sprint down the stairs…easy.

I generally chat with my Careem drivers. My dialect gives me away as an Egyptian immediately, and my name gives me away as Coptic² a little bit after. Not a single day goes by without meeting a new person who shows me so much kindness and hospitality purely for being an Egyptian in Jordan.

“From Egypt? Om El-Donia!³”
“My cousin married a Copt from Alexandria!”
“The kindest people are Egyptian.”
“Here is my number if you or your friends need anything.”
“I went with my family to Sharm El-Sheikh⁴ once, look at our pictures.”

It warms my heart to think that I am treated with great hospitality and respect because I am foreign to this country. Folks are eager to help because they often recognize that I do need their help. Jordanians truly are expert community makers.

The company I am interning in, Solar PiezoClean, is located on Wasfi at-Tall St. This street is one of the main arteries of northeast Amman, and it is busy on every hour of the day. I have made it a habit to stop by the kiosk right next to my building to fuel on Turkish coffee and a new pastry in the morning. There I met Reda, who makes the best morning coffee in all of Amman (I’m sure….trust), and wakes you right up with his lively attitude. On my third visit, he tried to refuse payment for my breakfast goods because “we are family now.” By my fourth visit, we exchanged numbers so we could keep in touch. 

“My son passed his Tawjihi⁵ subjects with a high cumulative grade! Inshallah⁶ he wants to study Mechatronics.”
“Have you had breakfast today? Try this Halloumi Croissant.”
“Hi Baba⁷, I haven’t seen you in a few days and I am worried about you. I hope to hear your voice to know you are okay.” 

At time of writing, I have just finished reading the book All About Love by bell hooks. I couldn’t help but fixate on Chapter 8, titled “Community: Loving Communion.” In my pondering about forming community, I found myself coming back to this excerpt.

“We can begin the process of making community wherever we are. We can begin by sharing a smile, a warm greeting, a bit of conversation; by doing a kind deed or by acknowledging kindness offered to us. Doing this we engage in love practice […] we lay foundation for the building of community with strangers. The love we make in community stays with us wherever we go. With this knowledge as our guide, we make any place we go, a place where we return to love.”

When I first moved to the US as a teenager, I was worried about losing my home and family. The only circle I had known was left behind in Egypt. I quickly came to learn that communities can be rebuilt with intention and kindness, and I found myself slowly but surely fitting in my own nooks. Similarly, I left that community to live and study at MIT, and found myself among new and exciting people.

I am privileged to have called many people my family, and slept under many roofs I called a home. These experiences redefined for me the idea of belonging somewhere, home truly is where my community is. It is bittersweet to create a new home and leave it behind, but my summer in Amman is a reminder of just how easy it can be to form community.

1. Careem: A rideshare app that is very popular and widely used in Jordan and across the Arab world.
2. Copt(ic): “A member of the traditional Monophysite Christian church originating and centering in Egypt” – Merriam Webster
3. Om El-Donia: literal Arabic translation is “mother of the world”, a phrase commonly used to describe Egypt and its ancient civilization
4. Sharm El-Sheikh: Popular Egyptian coastal city on the Red Sea.
5. Tawjihi: Final exams for high school students in Jordan, a very important big deal !!
6. Inshallah: literal translation “If God wills it”, a phrase often used among Arabic speakers to mean hoping for something in the future.
7. Baba: nickname for “dad”, is often used as a term of endearment that fathers call their daughters.